Divorce is not an easy thing to deal with, for the couple separating and for the kids as well. It is of utmost importance for parents to discuss with their children about the separation, preferably before the physical separation or very soon thereafter. Parents can expect that talking with children about separation will be difficult and painful. Here are some ideas to help you plan your discussion, as it is extremely important that you do it right.
Discuss the divorce with your child as soon as you and your partner have finalized the decision to separate. It is good to have both parents for the discussion.
Despite how you each feel, try to reach an agreement to contain your anger or hate in front of your children. Do not use the talk as an opportunity to destroy your children’s relationship with the other parent. Although your relationship with your spouse did not work, try to protect your children’s right to have healthy relationships with both parents.
Be honest about the reasons for the separation. Emphasize that the divorce is not the child’s fault and that you will continue to love them unconditionally.
Expect reactions from your children, but don’t rush them. Accept their anger, tears, and fears. Be open to the questions they may have now and in the future. The first talk about the divorce must be followed by many other discussions to foster a trusting relationship with your children.